Tree Love
Bobby and the Tree  One day the big, giant tree from Hell was getting pretty bored so it decided to find a village of peasants and melt it. When it finally found a nice, quiet village it got ready to begin its fiery rain of death and destruction when it noticed something odd. It seemed two of the peasants had their lips stuck together. The big, giant tree from Hell decided to watch them for a while. Eventually their lips unlocked and they moved apart. The big, giant tree from Hell was confused, what were these silly peasants doing? The big, giant tree from Hell had to find out so it headed home and gave its pal the big, giant tulip from Hell a call. The big, giant tulip from Hell explained to the big, giant tree from Hell that probably the two peasants were kissing because they were probably in love. In love? The big, giant tree from Hell didn't know anything about love. It Bobby and the Tree had never been in love before. It asked the big, giant tulip from Hell if it would mind being in love with it, but the big, giant tulip from Hell said it was already in love with the big, giant weed from Hell so the big, giant tree from Hell would have to find its own lover. So the big, giant tree from Hell decided to do just that. It decided the best way to get a mate would be to put out a personal add. BGTFH seeks mate to love. Luckily the personal add was quickly answered by a handsome man named Bobby. Bobby told the big, giant tree from Hell that he would take care of it. The big, giant tree from Hell learned all about love. Bobby would trim off dead branches, make sure there were no termites, and run off squirrels for the big, giant tree from from Hell. In turn the big, giant tree from Hell would burn and melt Bobby's mortal enemies. The two lived happily for several weeks until one evening. It was the annual big, giant things from Hell banquet and Bobby and the big, giant tree from Hell got all dressed up. When they got to the banquet Bobby and the Tree the big, giant tree from Hell started talking to its friends and listened to their stories of cruelty and malice. The big, giant tree from Hell realized that it had begun to lose its edge ever since it fell in love. This was horrible. There was only one thing the big, giant tree from Hell could do, it had to break up with Bobby. It was a messy break up, it took Bobby several months to heal from the emotion scars and second degree burns it got from the big, giant tree from Hell. Luckily in the end, though, the big, giant tree from Hell regained its edge and returned to terrorizing innocent people.